... is greater far than tongue or pen can ever tell.
God has been teaching me a lot about His love recently. I wanted to share some of it with you. I have been reading a wonderful book Not By Sight by Jon Bloom. It is a "Fresh look at old stories of walking by faith". I have really been intrigued by the creative retelling of these stories and the lessons he shares through them. Although I do think you have to be careful when trying to "re-write" the Bible, I also think that Jon Bloom does a good job of stating the facts by quoting scripture and making the disclaimer that these retellings are not fact, but they are trying to get at the heart of the stories and make them more real to the reader. He also draws lessons from each story and has some really good points to make that I've never associated with these stories before. One story and one paragraph in particular got my attention this week. The story is from John 11 about Lazarus and Martha and here is the point he makes about trust in God's plan and His love:
"God only ordains our deep disappointment and profound suffering for the sake of far greater joy in the glory he will reveal to us (Rom. 8:18). It is crucial to remind one another of this. Before we know what Jesus is doing, circumstances can look all wrong. And we are tempted to interpret God's apparent inaction as unloving, when in fact God is loving us in the most profound way he possibly can.
So in your anguish of soul hear Jesus ask with strong affection, 'Do you believe this?'" (John 11:26)
One thing I've been realizing about why I sometimes doubt God's love for me is that I have a very poor definition of love. What I think love is, God doesn't seem to be doing or showing, so I don't think God loves me. But, in fact, I've got it backwards. I should be defining love by what I see from God because God is love. God is the very definition of love. I cannot define love apart from God. How prideful of me to think that I know what love should look like better than God knows. (That's another thing God's been teaching me–that pride is at the root of most of my sins and false thinking)
So when I read this chapter about Martha's struggle with the question of why Jesus let Lazarus die, I realized that I was interpreting God's apparent inaction in my own life as unloving, when in fact I can know and trust that He is loving me in the most profound way possible because He can do nothing else. It would be against His character to act any other way.
Whoa... that's pretty cool. Hard to trust, but cool.
God can never not love you or me.
So, I want you and I to hear Jesus ask with strong affection, "Do you believe this?"
Monday, November 11, 2013
Sunday, November 10, 2013
On Halloween...
As much as I love candy, I still don't like Halloween. And this year's Halloween was especially crazy. I am glad that it's over!
This week of school started out like a normal week until about 9:30am on Monday. That's when I got the email that said we will have early outs on Monday and Thursday due to water issues in Mission. Oh boy... bus time at the end of a school day is always crazy and a little stressful, but when you push it back to 1pm instead of 3:30pm it's ridiculous. The kids all know that they get to go home early, and they get very, very antsy. Anyway, that was an adventure... also on Monday 2 of my students missed the bus because their bus left 5 minutes early. Fortunately their bus came back for them. Then on Tuesday we had an unexpected early out because of continued water issues that day...
Then on Wednesday we had our Halloween carnival which got our students all riled up :) And Thursday was Halloween, so our class went trick or treating in the morning around the town to different businesses that wanted us to come. We got back and made some Halloween snacks, ate lunch, then went home. It was such an out-of-routine week that 2 of our more difficult students, were more difficult than usual. Needless to say, I was exhausted, even though I got to come home early because of the early outs.
The best part of this week, though, was when our inservice on Friday got cancelled, also due to the water issues in Mission. It was even better than a snow day! After this crazy week, I'm not sure I'll be able to go back to a normal school week.
As I've struggled through the crazy days and students this week, God has been teaching me a lot. I've realized that I often respond badly to stressful or irritating circumstances. I am a very impatient person. This week I got pretty short with several students for not following directions. What I am starting to realize is that most of my impatience and sometimes anger at difficult circumstances is rooted in pride. I want things my way, and I want them that way now. As I walked down the gravel road today, I knew that I had to put that pride aside and take up my cross and surrender. I can't always change my circumstances, but I can change how I respond to them. As much as I want to be in control of my students behavior, I'm not, and I don't think I ever will be. That is up to them. All I can do is my best to follow God and leave it up to Him. It is so hard for me to give up control, even if it is just an illusion.
Those are my thoughts...
Peace
This week of school started out like a normal week until about 9:30am on Monday. That's when I got the email that said we will have early outs on Monday and Thursday due to water issues in Mission. Oh boy... bus time at the end of a school day is always crazy and a little stressful, but when you push it back to 1pm instead of 3:30pm it's ridiculous. The kids all know that they get to go home early, and they get very, very antsy. Anyway, that was an adventure... also on Monday 2 of my students missed the bus because their bus left 5 minutes early. Fortunately their bus came back for them. Then on Tuesday we had an unexpected early out because of continued water issues that day...
Then on Wednesday we had our Halloween carnival which got our students all riled up :) And Thursday was Halloween, so our class went trick or treating in the morning around the town to different businesses that wanted us to come. We got back and made some Halloween snacks, ate lunch, then went home. It was such an out-of-routine week that 2 of our more difficult students, were more difficult than usual. Needless to say, I was exhausted, even though I got to come home early because of the early outs.
The best part of this week, though, was when our inservice on Friday got cancelled, also due to the water issues in Mission. It was even better than a snow day! After this crazy week, I'm not sure I'll be able to go back to a normal school week.
As I've struggled through the crazy days and students this week, God has been teaching me a lot. I've realized that I often respond badly to stressful or irritating circumstances. I am a very impatient person. This week I got pretty short with several students for not following directions. What I am starting to realize is that most of my impatience and sometimes anger at difficult circumstances is rooted in pride. I want things my way, and I want them that way now. As I walked down the gravel road today, I knew that I had to put that pride aside and take up my cross and surrender. I can't always change my circumstances, but I can change how I respond to them. As much as I want to be in control of my students behavior, I'm not, and I don't think I ever will be. That is up to them. All I can do is my best to follow God and leave it up to Him. It is so hard for me to give up control, even if it is just an illusion.
Those are my thoughts...
Peace
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